I was all set to get my G.I. Jane on, coasting along in the malibenz, windows rolled down just a bit, but now low enough to catch what my mother calls “a death of new-mon-ya”! I turned to one of my favorite stations and I got hyped. Y’all, they were playing Eye Of The Tiger. Dude!! By Survivor!! That was, is, and shall forever be MY SHIT!! I don’t care what mood I’m in, when I hear that song I get hyped. So hyped that the entire time I was running the mandatory 17 blocks in 15 minutes, all I could think of was Eye Of The Tiger. I had my red hoody on! I was bad-ass!!! It is the hypest song, that doesn’t command me to shake my ass via explicit lyrics, with Lose Yourself coming in a far second. And if you don’t believe me, listen to it online if you can find it. Don’t ever say I didn’t hip you to the hotness. Feel the love!
According to Leon, I’m fine. However, Leon ain’t been knowing me all that long!!! Leon has only been reading since I was “The Show” over on blogger. But what Leon doesn’t know is that I, The After Party Hostess, the semi-celeb he had a crush on, used to be fine!!!! We’ve known each other for a minute now. I feel like some of y’all have done me wrong!! Wrong!!! Why come y’all didn’t tell me? Why come I had to discover this shyt damn near on my own?? Or with the help of a certain someone. *eyeroll* And I’m not even just talking about the physical. So don’t give me that crap about people naturally changing their physical look over time. Cus see, I’m talking about the total me.
That’s right! I said it! Right now, in my mind, I’ve fallen off. For shame!!! I haven’t taken a class since like 2000!!! My mind is slowly turning to mush! Y’all can tell my spelling is getting worse with time. I bet if I was writing for academic purposes or didn’t have a team of editors looking at what I write for work, my spelling would be a whole lot better. Plus, I’ve gained weight. Still in single digits, but damn! I used to be a size 2-4. Now I’m a 6 long, 8 regular. Be still my pulsating heart!!!!! My frame isn’t made to be more than 125 lbs!
I like learning new shyt. I even like learning in a formal setting. But what the hell have I been doing with myself for the last five years?? If I take some classes can I get those student loan people to raise up off my neck and let a b*tch take a breath for a few months? Anyone? I actually like writing papers!! I was helping my brother with an essay and I was a tiny bit jelous. He’s in college getting his daily learn on and I’m not!!! Ugh!! Maybe I’ll get me one of those Ph.D.’s that seem to be all the rage.
I would have never known that things were changing for me because people damn sure don’t tell you. And it’s hard to really see yourself when you’re with yourself everyday. Ya know? There are people who’ve known me since I was ten who didn’t pull me to the side and tell me I was falling off. Because sometimes we need to be reminded of the goals we had or the path we’re supposed to be taking. I’m one who strongly believes in constructive criticism. Excuse me, tactful constructive criticism. But too often I think people end up criticizing out of anger or hatefulness. Not out of love.
Y’all ever notice that when Serenity 23 or anyone makes mention of my spelling or grammar (grammer), it doesn’t bother me. I don’t think they’re doing it to be nasty. It’s just something that they do. As a matter of fact, when nobody points out some of my more obvious spelling and grammar mistakes, I’m shocked. One time, I have an error in the freaking title and nobody said anything. Tisk-tisk!
A lot of people think their shyt is so tight there’s no room for improvement. Eh. Really? Eve if my stuff is right-tight, I still can do better than I did yesterday. One parts of my brother’s essay dealt with his weaknesses. This little arrogant snot-wad told me he couldn’t think of any areas where he was lacking. Thank goodness we weren’t having this discussion in person because I would have pinched the crap out of him. Pinching is what I do to remind my brothers who’s really the boss! Because my brothers are like twice as big as me. He clearly hadn’t been getting his share of contructive criticism. Just because his ass has never been to jail, has a job, and is in college, I think he thinks his shyt doesn’t stink! Ugh!!!
When I was reading my brother’s essay, I just came out and told him what he’d written was crap. I went on to tell him he gets lazy and doesn’t stay motivated long enough to complete a task to the best of his ability. After I told him, I made very pointed suggestions about how he could improve the paper. Because constructive criticism not coupled with ideas on improvement usually leads to hurt feelings.
I have friends I can’t tell shyt to. Not a thing. Because if anyone says anything to go against what they are doing, that person is hating. WTF-ever. If I know someone well and I see them doing something not beneficial to their well-being and overall life plan, I’m going to say something. They can not like it all they want. But they know me and know I’m going to say something.
What is up with this? Do people gain some sliver of success and think they are too good to recieve criticism?? Are people scared to give it? Are we just scared that the truth is we aren’t as great as we think we are? Are we too scared or arrogant to look at ourselves when we do recieve criticism? Are we trained–thanks to Puffy ‘nem, that anyone who does criticisize is hating?
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