Maybe I Was Wrong

I guess it’s been hitting me for a while. After the first month when he didn’t come running back and now even more today. Maybe it really is over. Maybe when I believed the things he said, how if ever we broke up he’d do everything in his power to win me back, maybe I was wrong. I don’t see how someone can be an integral part of your life, then BAM! Nothing! Like they never existed. This wasn’t what I agreed to. How I thought it would be. What was supposed to happen? We were supposed to date. He was supposed to not be able to get along without me. Not tell me he’s keeping busy. Especially when things aren’t going so well for me. I mean, IF he cared, wouldn’t he be here for me? Wouldn’t he have a hard time going through his days without checking on me? Checking for me?

And I wonder if I was right. Maybe I was just an accomplishment for him. Like so many other things. The cars, the house, the clothes. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe we were never really as connected. Maybe the talks of us having children and our life together were all in my head.

Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I can’t go more than three days without hearing his voice. Maybe I was wrong and he can go hours, days, weeks, and months without hearing mine. Maybe he can go without seeing me. Maybe I will forget what he smells like. Maybe I won’t forget his numbers as I’d predicted. Maybe…